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Not Easy Taking My Child To School

Trying to get back into the swing of things regarding school and work schedules isn't easy for us after a nice Winter Break.  I see a lot of mother's comment on how they can't wait for school to start again, but I'm not one of them.  One mom claimed to have been up, dressed and on her second cup of coffee just waiting for her kids to wake-up and get them off to school, she was so excited.  She and I are on different ends of that spectrum.

I know that the situation at Sandy Hook plays a part in my wanting to keep my kids home.  In fact, what happened there has created a kind of cloud in my thinking of just about everything.  Christmas was beautiful, but all the while I was wrapping my children's gifts I kept thinking of those that could not. My heart just hurts so much. 

I'm doing my best to push through.  But I'm beginning to wonder how much of this am I supposed to be feeling so intensely.  I wasn't there.  It didn't happen to me.  I don't personally know the victims.  It's just that our experiences are similar;  raising your child, getting them ready for the day, taking them to school.  Then that horror.

I have a tendency to remember bad things more than good.  Remember the criticism louder than the compliment.  I need to figure out a way to deal with things, and move on. 

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9 comments:

  1. After that Sandy Hooks incident, I now believe that no place is safe. It is really hard to move on from that horrific nightmare but alas, we have to let it go but never forget. If I can only be with my kid at all times, I would. If only I had a choice, I would love to homeschool my son. But, I am still in med school.

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    1. I know what you mean about homeschooling. (The idea of living in a bubble sounds good!)

      Good luck with your studies in Med School. I look forward to hearing more about that.

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  2. I don't think you should try and move on. This is something that hits at the core of all parents. We do everything we can to protect and provide for and teach our children, and there's an element that is out of our control and calls for faith - not only in any God, but in the people we leave our kids in the care of, the teachers.

    It hurts so bad because they were so young and it's impossible to imagine targeting kids like these. They're like our kids.

    I hope none of us truly gets over this.

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    1. You and I feel so similar about this situation. It was wonderful to read your post today.

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  3. I cried over that event too... I hate to see bad things happen to anyone. It was nice to see all of the positivity that came out as the community rallied support.

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    1. I wonder how the community dealt with Christmas, and New Year's Eve celebrations. I would like to know who is helping them heal.

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  4. I'm just not understanding why parents want to shove their kids out of the door so quickly. My kids are 10 and 8, and they have until the 7th before they go back to school. My kids are in no way perfect, but I love them and enjoy their time, so we have crafts and movies planned until the 7th. I'm happy they are home with me. Do they stress me out? Sure they do, but that can be cured by cuddling on the couch with them while watching a movie.
    And this is how I felt before Sandy Hook. Now? Cuddling on the couch watching movie everyday seems like an ideal plan...
    Great post! =)

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  5. You're not alone, Ann. The Sandy Hook incident affected many of us and the way we now view our children. I can understand your sadness in taking your kids back to school. Give yourself time to heal and your faith will begin to increase.

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  6. I'll admit I've a bit of both types of "MOM" in me there was a little part that was excited to have them go back---the last three days I felt like I was living with the Bickersons! My son was also excited to go back--he missed seeing his friends.

    But on the other hand I didn't want to send them back to school EVER after Sandy Hook. Then my realistic side took over again I realized that no matter how much we want to keep our kids in a bubble until they are 30-we're NOT doing them any good. As horrendous as that incident is-- life's ups and downs are what makes us stronger people.

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