Dreaming of Beckham

So I'm in this gorgeous home over looking the ocean. Beautiful, plush white furniture with delicately decorated throw pillows. Beautiful lamps are next to vases filled with lush flowers. It's just gorgeous. My husband is there. We smile and each other. What a lovely morning.
Then David and Victoria Beckham walk in.
"Good Morning you two!" 'Good morning! How did you sleep?' "I slept really well" says David Beckham, rubbing his head.
Victoria plops down beside me on the couch and says "Isn't this a beautiful home? What should we do today?"
Rob and I look at each other and I say 'Let's see if Jean and Lionel have any plans' (Jean and Lionel being Dame Judi Dench and Geoffrey Palmer from my favorite BBC show "As Time Goes By".)
"It's really nice that they let us stay here. Really." says my secret boyfriend David Beckham. I just love saying his name
At this point I wake up to the song "What's That Smell, I Don't Know" from my youngests play "Ananzi The Spider" in which she plays a monkey.
Ah... yes... a dream. Crap.
I really deserved that dream. The days have been a bit stressful.
Have I told you about my oldest wanting to see if she could still fit in a toddler swing at the park? The kind that is a little pouch with holes for the legs.
Well, let's just say SHE CAN'T! As proven by the fact that I couldn't get her legs back out of the holes and had to call 911.
And when the first truck realized that it didn't have the right equipment it had to call for a second truck. Which meant more of the town coming to see the 10 year old girl stuck in a toddler swing.
All the while my youngest is keeping herself entertained by rolling around in the grass just so she could stop and pick off any leaves, flower petals or what-not that stuck to her clothes, just to start all over again.
The fire-"people" cut her down from the swing so they could at least lie her on a bench to try and cut the rubber. (It's suprising how strong that rubber is! Our children will never fall from that swing, I can tell ya' that!)
They had to tear that sucker apart from the bolts. It was ridiculous!!!
1 1/2 hours later she was out.
Can you believe one 10 year old brought 2 teams of firefighters to their wits end trying to think of how to get her out of a toddler swing?!?
Next week she has a class field trip to, you guessed it, the fire station. She's let it be known that she does NOT want to go. I really can't blame her.

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  1. OMG that girl is never going to have swings for her children...poor thing!

  2. Oh my, that's some good material. I'm sure it wasn't the least bit amusing at the time but it makes for a great story to tell.

  3. That's a funny story. And, good luck at the fire station. :)

  4. OMG! Thanks for the laugh. ( we are allowed to laugh, right?). I wish you were able to take a photo but I'm sure it wasn't so amusing at the time.

    This tops any "most embarrassing" story I could hold over my boys' heads. I hope you can take off from work and be on that field trip!

  5. Hi Ann! Thanks for stopping by my blog today. I never knew a cardinal could drive me so crazy!
    Loved your park story. So ... did you see any good looking firemen? I mean after an hour and a half I sure there had to be one you'll have a dream about tonight ~ right?

  6. Oh Ann, that's a good one and one I have never heard before! Go back to sleep and try to recapture that dream- you deserve it!

  7. Hi Ann,

    Posh and Becks (as the tabloids over here call them) are all yours. All they do is feature in advertising clad in oversized sunglasses and pout alot.

    If you enjoy 'As Time Goes By', you'd love another BBC show called 'The Good Life'. A show I seem to enjoy increasingly as the repeats go by. Im either getting wittier as I get older or just a bigger fan of middle class, unoffensive comedy! Will be ready for my allotment very soon I reckon!


  8. Oh, Ann!!! What would we do without our children doing those kinds of things? :-)
    I can just see her, too...!
    Aw, man...
    Jordan will get a laugh out of this!


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