I Don't Accept Texts - Now She Knows

I am honestly proud of Katie.  After receiving her text of "Going somewhere after school with a friend" yesterday, (Post: "You Think Sending A Text Makes This OK?") I arrived at her school at pick-up time with some questions. And, I liked her answers.

Katie doesn't have her own phone (it's been misplaced) so I called the number she texted from and she answered.  I know who the phone belongs to, so no worries there.  Katie sounded happy and told me she and her friend were going to Starbucks.  I then surprised her with the news that I was actually parked and waiting for her and that she needed to come see me.  She wasn't thrilled.

Since this is the first time we've had this situation I didn't want to embarrass her in front of her friend.  I wanted to see if Katie would figure out this was not the way to go about things on her own, which she did.  We went over the text she sent, and I asked if it left any questions for me about what was going on.  She said, "Wow. This isn't very clear is it?  Sorry, I was in a hurry."  That's fine and all but still.  Call me.  Ca-a-a-ll me if you want to go somewhere that's not a normal part of our schedule.  I need to spe-e-e-ak to you about things.  No texting!  

We talked more and I sent her on her way to Starbucks with her friend.  Well, actually I drove them there because it started to rain.  I really need to toughen my girl up to the Pacific Northwest "Liquid Sunshine".

I'm doing my best to lessen the grip on the reigns.  But it's not easy.

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  1. You handled the situation very well. I'm going to use this with my 11 year old daughter. Calmly ask the question, "was anything left out of this message I might be interested in knowing?" The question asking method really is brilliant. By verbalizing what they need to do next time, it sticks in their heads better. Thanks for the tip! This is my daughter's first year with a cell phone (only calling and texting, no internet), and its been a year of figuring out the boundaries, for sure.

    1. Thank you for your comment Melinda. Let me know how your daughter does with her cell phone. (And if you have any tips, please share!)

  2. My 'prob' with my 12 year old son is more or less the same. We are currently experiencing a sort of power struggle as he tries to discover himself and his personality and me being a little unwilling to let go. We are going through this as slowly and carefully as possible because of the possible consequences of me holding too tight and he fighting me off. XD


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