And a "What Would You Do?"
Preparations were underway for my daughter's 13th birthday party; I booked the place, ordered the cake and made invitations. Things are scaled back this year in that she could invite 5 friends instead of the normal pack of 10. I understand that made it tough for her but that's just the way things are. So on each invitation I put the name of the invited guest. I felt labeling them would help her when handing them out so if a friend did a little "Hey, what about me?" Katie could blame her "Mean Mom" by saying, "Mom will only let me invite so many" blah, blah, blah.
I did receive a phone call from one parent whose child had told her about the party and the parent wanted to confirm since she didn't see an invitation. I felt badly explaining that things needed to be scaled back this year, but the parent sounded like they understood and the conversation went well.
One of the invited guests is a quiet girl and classmate of Katie's. This quiet girl has a brother one year older. I knew this invite was going to be a problem because Katie does play with him rarely but he's not my favorite and Katie didn't want to invite him. I made sure to put one name on that invite so there would be no confusion.
So here we are, the day before the party and I hadn't heard from the quiet girls parents, so I called to confirm that their daughter would be attending. The father sounded odd and said "Uh, yeah, she'll be there." Lovely. Another enthusiastic participant. Later that night, around 9:00 pm, I get a call from the mom that doesn't start with a "Hi. How are you?" or a little "Do you have time to talk?". Nope. I am addressed with "My husband was confused earlier because our son told us that Katie invited him to the party too."
I told her I didn't know anything about that and that we were doing the best we could however the party is very limited this year. She replied "So you want me to tell him he can't go?" I apologized again (like an idiot, I was so flustered) and then said, 'If it's easier for your daughter not to attend that's fine.' I was so-o-o-o done. She laughed and said that that wouldn't make things easier. Gee, really? It would for me!
Again she said "Our son was really looking forward to going." I told her "Look. What I know is that we have room for 5 guests. I made invitations for 5 guests. I wrote your daughters name on the invite, I saw my daughter put it in your mailbox and I hadn't heard from you until now. If this party is an inconvenience to you I'm sorry, you can just have your child not attend." She said, "I'll have her there tomorrow." I had the highly intelligent come back, 'Whatever' and hung-up.
What I don't get is the fact that they didn't call me to confirm about this supposed verbal invite. Wouldn't you call the host and say "Hey, just wanted to check..." Doesn't that make sense? Wouldn't you just get your "parent radar" buzzing, especially since this charming young man of yours has a crazy history of habitually lying and causing physical pain to those around him? Wouldn't there be any doubt that he was truly invited? No, no of course not. It's easier for me to be the one that sucks then for you to step up and call your son out. I see.
Have you ever had this situation?
And a "What Would You Do?"